Live.Love.Laugh
After a month of being diagnosed with anxiety due to unexpected circumstances, I finally got a little vacay from life and hung out with the fam for a whole weekend. DEFINITELY NEEDED THIS!
This is what I learned so far from all of the suffering i've experienced throughout last month... is that we ONLY have one life, this ain’t no practice session, this is the real deal. LIVE IT!
All love!
Congrats to our new President-Elect, Joe Biden and Vice President-Elect Kamala Harris
The country I live in has a pretty bitter divide between many of its people, and I’ll admit that it often feels hopeless to me.
If you don’t live in the U.S., I’m sure you can see a similar divide in your country as well: People judging each other, angry and fearful, feeling very little understanding and compassion.
We’re all doing it, and blaming the other side.
So what can we do to heal this divide?
For me, the answer lies in compassion. Compassion for others in our country, and in the world, who are suffering. Compassion for our neighbors, for people who have different views, for people who are afraid and who just want a good life. Compassion for ourselves as we try to make our way through a difficult situation.
But compassion is difficult right now, so just telling people to have compassion doesn’t work. The problem is that our views about who is right and wrong is getting in the way of compassion and healing the divide.
So the real key to this is in setting aside our views and setting aside being right. The real key to healing this divide is letting go of what we think we know.
It’s only when we let go of what we think we know that we can be curious about the other side. Try to understand why they do what they do, why they feel the way they feel. Try to step into their world, and get them.
It’s only when we let go of our knowing and step into not knowing that we can really see their side, and feel compassion for them.
Once we do that, the compassion can come and the healing can begin.
Set aside what we think we know.
Open to not knowing how things should be. Open to curiosity about their side.
Open to feeling compassion for what they’re going through.
Let’s connect with each other, and come together.
Alongside with the other 28,000 cast members that got laid off, I also got the “call.” Thank you Disney for 4 years of of MAGICAL memories that I will NEVER EVER forget.
I’ve recently reminded myself of the value of dedicating some time to just clearing things out of my daily life.
It’s a simple truth that wherever things can accumulate, they will. Emails pile up, design work piles up, read ‘to-do-lists’ piles up, and etc....
This is the nature of things: they accumulate if we don’t tend to them.
And so, we must tend to them.
What I’ve found valuable is leaving some blocks of time for clearing things out and taking some time to yourself throughout your day, week, month, and year:
Some space at the end of each day to clear out your email inbox or unread messages in Slack
A time on the weekend for taking care of small chores, cruise through the beach, paddle board, eat brunch with my girlfriend, eat brunch, get dessert, and etc…
A Sunday weekly review where I make sure all the piles are cleared, my to-do and project lists are updated, and everything is in order
These don’t have to take long — an hour, a whole day, sometimes more than a day. Some things take a few hours and days, BUT you need to pamper yourself in order for you to “feel alive.”
The problem is that we pack our days with tasks, meetings, calls, and other things so much that we don’t leave spaciousness for tending to our lives. And when we do have some space, we tend to fill it with our favorite distractions.
That’s all fine, but it’s also incredibly helpful to leave some space to tending to our little gardens. Clear out the weeds, take care of things.
The mental health that results from tending to our lives, clearing out piles, and cleaning up messes is incredibly replenishing.
Took all the ladies (cousins and little sis) for a hike for the first time this year, and it was forsure a MUCH MUCH MUCH NEEDED activity to keep our sanities during this “pandemic.”
Me and the homie Andrew dining in live and direct from a parking lot eating our Chic-Fil-A. LOL
Momma Bear, Lil Sis, and I decided to go get Dunkin’ Donuts. And we don’t really give a flyinggggggggggg F#$!% about this quarantine life, because we still have a life to live and donuts to munch on and ice coffee to drink. LOL
LOCATION: The Wedge - Newport Beach, CA
Today, March 29th, I turn 26 years old.
I’ve been on this earth for nearly 3 decades. *Seeing a city like Paris, where there are buildings that measure their age by the millennia and nostalgic architectures* But it helps me put that brief “blink of an eye” into perspective. But still, it amazes me that I’ve been around that long — I feel like I’ve barely begun.
I’m not usually one to make a big deal about my birthday, but as always, it has given me an opportunity to reflect. I thought I’d share a handful of lessons I’ve learned — as a helpful guide for those just starting out.
This post is for my readers and followers, whom I’am truly thankful for. I hope this will shine a dim light on the streets that we all currently living in.
Always swallow your pride to say you’re sorry. Being too proud to apologize is never worth it — your relationship suffers for no good benefit.
Possessions are worse than worthless — they’re harmful. They add no value to your life, and cost you everything. Not just the money required to buy them, but the time and money spent shopping for them, maintaining them, worrying about them, insuring them, fixing them, etc.
Slow down. Rushing is rarely worth it. Life is better enjoyed at a leisurely pace.
Goals aren’t as important as we think. Try working without them for a week. Turns out, you can do amazing things without goals. And you don’t have to manage them, cutting out on some of the bureaucracy of your life. You’re less stressed without goals, and you’re freer to choose paths you couldn’t have foreseen without them.
The moment is all there is. All our worries and plans about the future, all our replaying of things that happened in the past — it’s all in our heads, and it just distracts us from fully living right now. Let go of all that, and just focus on what you’re doing, right at this moment. In this way, any activity can be meditation.
You can’t motivate people. The best you can hope for is to inspire them with your actions. People who think they can use behavioral “science” or management techniques have not spent enough time on the receiving end of either.
Mistakes are the best way to learn. Don’t be afraid to make them. Try not to repeat the same ones too often.
Failures are the stepping stones to success. Without failure, we’ll never learn how to succeed. So try to fail, instead of trying to avoid failure through fear.
The destination is just a tiny slice of the journey. We’re so worried about goals, about our future, that we miss all the great things along the way. If you’re fixated on the goal, on the end, you won’t enjoy it when you get there. You’ll be worried about the next goal, the next destination.
Let go of expectations. When you have expectations of something — a person, an experience, a vacation, a job, a book — you put it in a predetermined box that has little to do with reality. You set up an idealized version of the thing (or person) and then try to fit the reality into this ideal, and are often disappointed. Instead, try to experience reality as it is, appreciate it for what it is, and be happy that it is.
Giving is so much better than getting. Give with no expectation of getting something in return, and it becomes a purer, more beautiful act. Too often we give something and expect to get an equal measure in return — at least get some gratitude or recognition for our efforts. Try to let go of that need, and just give.
Competition is very rarely as useful as cooperation. Our society is geared toward competition — rip each other’s throats out, survival of the fittest, yada yada. But humans are meant to work together for the survival of the tribe, and cooperation pools our resources and allows everyone to contribute what they can. It requires a whole other set of people skills to work cooperatively, but it’s well worth the effort.
Gratitude is one of the best ways to find contentment. We are often discontent in our lives, desire more, because we don’t realize how much we have. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, be grateful for the amazing gifts you’ve been given: of loved ones and simple pleasures, of health and sight and the gift of music and books, of nature and beauty and the ability to create, and everything in between. Be grateful every day.
Create. The world is full of distractions, but very few are as important as creating. In my job as a writer, there is nothing that comes close to being as crucial as creating. In my life, creating is one of the few things that has given me meaning. When it’s time to work, clear away all else and create.
Get some perspective. Usually when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. In the larger picture, this one problem means almost nothing. This fight we’re having with someone else — it’s over something that matters naught. Let it go, and move on.
Learn the art of empathy. Too often we judge people on too little information. We must try to understand what they do instead, put ourselves in their shoes, start with the assumption that what others do has a good reason if we understand what they’re going through. Life becomes much better if you learn this art.
Do less. Most people try to do too much. They fill life with checklists, and try to crank out tasks as if they were widget machines. Throw out the checklists and just figure out what’s important. Stop being a machine and focus on what you love. Do it lovingly.
Love comes in many flavors. I love my children, completely and more than I can ever fully understand. I love them each in a different way, and know that each is perfect in his or her own way.
Life is exceedingly brief. You might feel like there’s a huge mass of time ahead of you, but it passes much faster than you think.
Fear will try to stop you. Doubts will try to stop you. You’ll shy away from doing great things, from going on new adventures, from creating something new and putting it out in the world, because of self-doubt and fear. It will happen in the recesses of your mind, where you don’t even know it’s happening. Become aware of these doubts and fears. Shine some light on them. Beat them with a thousand tiny cuts. Do it anyway, because they are wrong.
I have a lot left to learn. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I know almost nothing, and that I’m often wrong about what I think I know. Life has many lessons left to teach me, and I’m looking forward to them all.
I still have a lot left to learn. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I know almost nothing. Life has many lessons left to teach me, and I’m looking forward to them all and in hope to pass the torch to future generations.
So I know that we were supposed to be in “quarantine” and we can’t have more than 10 people in one place, but guess what? I’M STILL LIVING and I’am going to do whatever I can to celebrate my life in a “safe” manner. So I invited my fam and the homie Andrew to DJ over to celebrate my birthday. It sucks that I can’t do anything outside such as: going to the club, eat dinner, go to Vegas or even maybe Hawaii… But I’am still grateful that I got to spend my cake day w/ my family and friends.
Thanks to all of you guys that greeted me “happy birthday!” I truly appreciate each and every single one of y’all!
-AG
